


I'm Like 75% Sure This Won't Blow Up On Us

by peridoll



Series: Writing Prompts (Ficlets) [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, F/F, Ficlet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-29
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-07-18 22:39:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7333429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peridoll/pseuds/peridoll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amethyst and Peridot are having a blast defusing a bomb. Human AU. Ficlet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Like 75% Sure This Won't Blow Up On Us

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This was a little writing prompt from an ask meme on tumblr. I thought I'd post it here! I don't really ship Amethyst and Peridot all that much, but their dynamic is adorable and super fun to work with, and I had fun! <3

“Stay calm, Amethyst,” Peridot assured rapidly, hands wringing together nervously as she stared down at the bomb before them. God knows why the agency had chosen to put a neurotic mechanic who cares _too_ much with a war veteran turned secret agent who cares too _little_. It was a match made in Hell, but an amusing match at least. In fact, the only one who really needed to stay calm was Peridot, who was much younger, much more naive, and _much_ more high-strung. “Just- just stay calm! Everything will be fine!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Amethyst hummed in return, chewing on the end of a finished lollipop stick. The blue raspberry flavoring had turned her lips and tongue blue, and the veteran, with burn scars littering her hands and neck, whipped out her iPhone to snap a quick selfie with the currently ticking bomb at their feet. “Nice, save that one for the photo album.”

The younger girl’s bright green eyes, filled with such youth and overflowing enthusiasm, widened in horror. “A-A- Are you kidding me?! Now is  _ not  _ the time to be taking selfies! We could  _ die _ !”

Amethyst’s attention was completely diverted to her phone’s screen, where she  _ tap tap tap _ ped away. “Uh-huh,” she hummed nonchalantly, scratching at her chin.

Meanwhile, the bomb started to tick even faster, and the bright red LED numbers on the small screen attached to the front read  _ 1:14 _ . Peridot grew even more distressed. She dropped to her knees at the side of the bomb, which nearly reached the short girl’s hips in height, and started tugging at wires. “We really should be focusing on, you know, STOPPING THIS BOMB!” her voice boomed, and sweat beaded at the edge of her scarf.

“Oh, right,” the lavender haired soldier halted suddenly, dropping beside her frantic partner. They were about the same height, although Amethyst always stood up straighter and Peridot hunched over. “The bomb. Yeah, uh- what’s the update with that? You makin’ progress?”

Now that Amethyst’s attention was back on the danger at hand, Peridot let out a slight sigh of relief. “Well... I’m like 75% sure this won’t blow up on us.” The mechanic paused, flinching as she continued to examine the tangled mess of blue, red, and green wires. “Okay, maybe more like... 35%. But! That’s still better than 0%!”

Amethyst clapped a hand on Peridot’s shoulder, making her jump. “I like your confidence, baby.” She chuckled, standing once again with a groan of effort. “Keep at it.”

A hotness spread fast across Peridot’s face, and she stuttered some nonsense before burying her face into the wires to focus. “I just- I need to cut the right one. You know they never trained me for this? I’m basing all of my knowledge off of action movies right now.”

The other agent raised an eyebrow, then snorted. “Nice. Don’t they always cut the red wire? Wait... or is it  _ don’t  _ cut the read wire?” She grinned ear from ear, a shit-eating grin for the Guinness World Record book.

“I-I think?! Fuck, I don’t know!”

“Well just cut one! We’re running out of time!”

The clock now read  _ 0:32  _ and the the ticking had turned into urgent beeping that got louder and faster by the second. Peridot took her wire cutters and rolled one of the red wires between her fingers. Then she switched to the green. Then the blue. Then another green, before she threw up her arms and growled.

“I don’t know! We’re gonna die!” she screeched, and Amethyst crouched to her level once again.

“Chill, P-dot. You got this. Don’t let it...  _ blow up in your face _ . Conquer the bomb.” Even though the corner of Amethyst’s plump lips twitched into a playful smirk, her words brought an odd calm over Peridot, and the mechanic took a deep breath.

“Now isn’t the time for bomb puns, but thanks...”

The clock read  _ 0:14 _ . Peridot swallowed nervously. She raised her wire cutters back up to the mess of colored strands. She studied them closely until the clock hit 5 seconds, then picked one of the green ones.

_ 3. _

_ 2. _

_ 1. _

_ Snip. _

The small closet they were hunkered down in went dead silent, and Peridot held her breath, waiting for an explosion that would surely blow both of them to pieces until their families couldn’t recognize their mangled bodies. But that never came. Instead, Amethyst stood, giving her arms a good stretch.

“Nice work,” the war veteran cooed, patting the top of Peridot’s headscarf. “By the way, that bomb wasn’t real. This  _ was  _ your training. You passed.” She cracked another signature grin while Peridot stared, jaw dropped.

“...Oh.”


End file.
